PS. NOT TO MENTION THE NEW CUTZ... Says Uni Q. Mical , Tuesday, September 22, 2009 at 4:35 PM, in Labels: afro, brooklyn, hair, khane kutzwell, mohawk, nyc, twist

so, my official "dyke in nyc" hairstyle is on. like many others, i did the daunting task of getting a frohawk (my girlfriend gave me shit for appropriating the style, which i deserved...but also refuted with black girl entitlement that "i just like the way it looks").

as i arrived...ya might've caught me around town with this, aka the "twist and shout":

or maybe even this, the nappy fro:

then, i got bored. and now, i'm gettin all these strange stares, as if half of the pop in nyc doesn't already have a mo/frohawk of some sort:

annnd the other side, FRESSSHHHHH (for those who arent astrofreaks like myself, that's the symbol for sagittarius. ain't it obvious that i'm one?)

and these are the only pics you'll ever see of me up here.

ta-ta for now...

SHOUTOUT TO KHANE KUTZWELL FOR THE HOOKUP!!!! If u're in BK and need sum designs (and are queer, real talk), y'all needa go see about him!!!!!

BEEN SLEEPIN FOR TOO LONG: UNI Q'S REVENNNNNGE!!!!! Says Uni Q. Mical , at 3:45 PM, in Labels: AIDS, brooklyn, job, new york, nycahn, VOCAL

peeps, friends, foes who knows...

ya gurrral is back.

and it's been a helluva turnaround since last november (on my last post, i wasn't even 21 yet!)

but now that i've graduated from hampshire college, gave them my proverbial black gay ass to kiss with a graduation speech in front of thousands, got a SICK position as a community organizer in brooklyn (whoop-whoooop!) with new york city aids housing network/v.o.c.a.l. (voices of community advocates and leaders), i'm ready to make sum nooooiiiise again. in fact, i don't just want to. i NEED to.

upon arriving here to bk, LITERALLY fresh outta school with only a 2-week "break to reflect" at home, mostly spent w/ my peoples anyways, i saddled (sic) right into work. and this--this is no orrrrdinary work.

my job, new york city aids housing network (nycahn)/v.o.c.a.l. is one of few org's in the nation that organizes low-income people living with hiv/aids (plwha's, oh the acronyms) and former/active drug users to change laws and policies impacting their lives. so i as staff do the daunting task of outreach, through teach-ins, doorknocking, phonebanking, etc to ensure that we maintain our membership base of directly affected individuals. this is unlike anything i've ever seen or been in, as in my homebase b-more, and other cities across the nation, i've only ever witnessed advocacy groups--u kno, the ones that "speak on behalf" of individuals who are directly impacted. that, to me, reinforces hierarchy and doesn't change power dynamics for people who are living this shit EVERYDAY. i, for one, know i'm not hiv+ or an active drug user (outside of the magic dragon lol), so how would i know what the issues are?

these folks put face to name for politicians who create laws and have the power to take away the fucking little that poor folks already get. so folks who are living with the virus live in a variety of means: emergency housing or Single Room Occupancies, which the city pays $2000/month for a ROOM, supportive housing, or independent living, ie, your own apartment. but check this: IF YOU ARE A LOW-INCOME PLWHA IN NYC WHO RECEIVES HASA (public assistance for plwha who are hiv symptomatic) AND A SUPPLEMENTAL INCOME (SSI/D, veteran's benefits, etc), YOU ARE REQUIRED TO PAY UPWARDS OF 60-80% OF UR INCOME TOWARDS YOUR RENT FOR INDEPENDENT LIVING. HENCE, YOU ARE LEFT WITH $344 TO LIVE OFF OF FOR AN ENTIRE MONTH. $11 DOLLARS A DAY.

in what fucking world is this alright?

so, instead of bitching on about how this isn't alright/humane, nycahn gathered directly impacted people to urge albany to pass a law mandating a "No More Than 30% Towards Our Rent" campaign. For some reason, these 11,000 new yorkers are the only low-income group that have to pay more than 30% of their income towards their rent, EVEN with a comprimsed immune system, and the necessity of basic needs constantly looming overhead. HASA hasn't changed the $344 number since the 80s. Believe it or not, it WAS $330 until last month, when there was a--YIPPEE!!!--FOURTEEN DOLLAR INCREASE.

in my nearly four months of working here, i've witnessed some serious strides with this bill, and relearned everything from my american government class--even the "i'm just a bill" song played through my head a few times. it's currently stuck in the ways & means committee in the more progressive assembly, though it passed the conservative senate with a SWOOP of a 52-1 vote. SHOUT OUT TO SENATOR TOM DUANE FOR HIS PASSIONATE 3:30AM SPEECH TO PASS THIS BILL, SINCE IT IS HIS BILL AFTER ALL:




politics bore me to shreds still, but the art of lobbying is something FIERCE and so satisfying and movement-shaking. i've been back and forth to albany with members, getting the hang of these pow-wows where members talk to politicians as if they were old buddies in order to PUSH this bill, figure out strategies to get it passed, who else do we need to meet with, what action/protest we might do if an xyz politician isn't persuaded, etc. willllld shit. to think that a bill like this was not introduced UNTIL 2009 means that thousands of people have lost their homes, and have had to move back into SROs, which often aren't kept tidy, don't have kitchens, and have some of the dimmest fucking wall colors i've seen. again, the city pays $2000/month to maintain these one-room shacks that aren't even the size of cubicles for upwards of 45-60 people in a building at a given time, INSTEAD of paying the share for people's rent. in the long run, it would save the city MILLIONS. POINT BLANK.

PHEW! i don't know when to shutup. but when i sign on for something, it literally becomes me. i haven't thought about myself in 3 and a half months--though that's ALL i thought about in school, locating me and my grew up poor-black-darkskinned-queer ass, and suddenly, i'm working with communities that force me to take 10 steps back to recognize even my own privilege as a college graduate who's employed enough to move away from home and support myself at 21. it's very rare i meet someone my age, as everyone's at least 10 yrs older than me. for one, i'm the only female-bodied person on staff, also the youngest (not the only Black, thank God), and brand fucking new in new york. so i got dues to pay, asses to whoop, and maaaad shit to prove.

but now, it's time to reclaim time for myself. here's one of my ways.

i'm sharing my world again. hope ya listenin.

<3
uniQ.

ps. i ain't even get to the drug user component of my work! that woulda been an essay...stay tuned...

Split My Black Gay Ass Down The Middle. Says Uni Q. Mical , Thursday, November 20, 2008 at 1:32 PM, in Labels: black, california, gay, huckabee, proposition 8, white people

So uhhh...I guess those "homosexuals" who voted 'no' on Proposition 8, and got a ton of hell from those blacks and latinos in California who voted 'yes'...don't deserve to marry? no?

What about if my black gay ass wanted to? is the fact that im black suddenly outweigh the fact that i'm queer? 

COME ON PEOPLE. THESE THINGS ARE NOT BLACK AND WHITE. HOW EASILY WE CAN BE SWAYED...

I decided to post this video from one of my favorite politicians, Mike Huckabee, who all of a sudden LOVES to align with us americans who "looked past race" and voted Obama...but says that the gay rights struggle for marriage is NOT equal to the civil rights struggle. Last I checked, rights were, well, RIGHTS. 

If we're really gonna talk rights and privileges, honestly, these predominantly middle class and white gay folks that are thinking about marriage don't represent me. Marriage isn't on my agenda. Lemme get some insurance, a place to live, and an inkling of a lifelong partner FIRST before i think of something so permanent. Lemme walk down the street holding hands w/ my womyn and not have to worry about gettin my head bashed in because two "dykes" don't do that shit around here. Lemme not have to deal with ignorant assholes who think all i need is some "good dick" to bring me back to "the other side." Til then, y'all can shove that marriage shit up your ass. There's bigger fish to fry in our lives.

But, for those that do wish to enjoy the same rights as heterosexual married couples, i'm right there with u. It's essential. But i fucking wish we could stop playing Oppression Olympics, or who-got-their-necks-hung-highest-from-a-tree-for demanding their rights, and really wake up and fight for ALL of us. 

Until then, these bigoted fucks will be the voices that dominate the mainstream discussion. And you'll believe eevvvvery worrrrrrd...

BECAUSE I LOVE MY PEOPLE... Says Uni Q. Mical , Tuesday, November 4, 2008 at 5:42 PM, in

...BUT I HATE THEIR BULLSHIT.

Walls of K.O.S.

(dedicated to my ppl who can't see above the concrete)

MY PEOPLE...HOLD ON.

MY PEOPLE...HOLD ON.

MY PEOPLE...

hold themselves in the highest esteem

address ourselves as 

brothas, 

sistas,

kings

and flyest of queens

MY PEOPLE

glow in summertime

glimmer with july in steam

wear earth tone colors

to blend this brown to blue and green

MY PEOPLE

advance in self

talking knowledge and wisdom

tellin others

we don't know we've been robbed of religion

taken from the slave ship

now camouflaged as a prison

conforming to the capitalist world that we live in

MY PEOPLE

wear hair natural, locs afros & twists

keep hair styled in love & a passionate bliss

never succumbing 2 white ideals of beauty--

but embracing AFRIKANNESS

MY PEOPLE.

somewhere within this knowledge of self

lays a fear of acknowledging anything else

my people say we're children of God

the stars that twinkle on the earth

the sun and moon as man and woman

who were created to give birth

BUT HOLD IT 

first thing u meet me

what's the greeting u say?

Peace, my sista

and i feel the love, it never hurts to spray

tho i know it's too early for me to burst in with 

GAY

for fears that you, MY PEOPLE,

will be lurking away

AND I'D

like to thank you for assuming that i'm straight.

no way for u to identify,

no rainbows bloomin from my face

but what i love to tolerate

is how we're so fluid with the race

until it comes down to sexuality

then u're spewin us with mace

and...

what's your argument again?

oh, riiight, it's just unsuitable to place

2 penises & 2 vaginas together,

so disillusioned, a DISGRACE

talking--

so boldly without knowing a different view is in the place

but the moment i say 

I'M GAY

u look confused at what to say.

so what is your fear, i ask?

let's open the floor for challengers!

and excuse me if i'm being presumptuous

or somebody's perspective gets silenced but

BROTHAS,

are u scared to have a gay friend

for fears u might be down with it?

i had no IDEA it rubbed off so easy,

that u hadda pin ur sexuality to the ground and if

ur defense

is there should be man, woman, and child in this

i can respect that

but what's really keeping u from coming across that

to dialogue in this?

and SISTAS,

why are u sitting so uncomfortable?

the last thing on my mind right now

is going down on u.

i'm not a recruiter,

no, not after ANY ounce of u

so why can't we just chill

without u thinkin that i'm after u???

tryna make me attractive to men--

squeezin me in dresses/perfume/& high heel shoes

to attract those that i don't desire

REMINDER:

THIS IS NOT SOMETHING THAT I CHOOSE.

what y'all can't seem to understand

the reason we're not coming out is...YOU.

for fear of ur insecurities,

for fear of what u'll do

for ur lack of understanding

bein trapped inside this booth

that how i'm living is unrighteous

disguising ur hatred as truth

but NONE of u know just what the God in the sky can do.

saying God only created us just for us to produce

is one of the most tired, tasteless of excuses

y'all are limiting God's outlook

cuz ain't we all created in this image?

are you truly analyzing what u believe in,

or are you a slave to your religion?

come on y'all, aint we all been mouthin off that it's time for us to uplift?

for every person i graze

we're all blessed with the gift

to bring us closer together

instead of focusin on these rifts

that push us further apart

when u see whose hips i'm holdin with my wrists.

and allow me to evoke the spirit

of MLK and the list

of black activists

who brought into change what they spit

and the countless others behind the scenes

who were gay and were hidden

i guess our commitment to the movement

aint valued the same...

if we're DIFFERENT.

but

who are YOU to decide what i do with this body???

y'all soundin like white supremacists

blockin them water fountains

blockin abortion lobbies

blockin them corporate dollars

let the topic of gays come up

errrybody resort to SILENCE.

dig deep into ur knowledge of self

and u'll discover a lotta walls

lotta fears layin undiscussed 

topics we keep hushed

as our culture falls

and this ignorance is accepted as our culture,

things we just all agree upon

some say if u're gay then that's a white thing

...last i checked, i was brought over here wit y'all.

and what does it benefit us to HUSH

when there's a boy who enjoys to call

women bitches in every sentence

to hide how he watches gay porn and gets off?

as more girls hide their tears behind drunk nites

cuz they couldn't afford to fall

as more rainbow children razor wrists in basements...

FOR LACK OF SUPPORT FROM Y'ALL.

and YES.

they are getting younger and younger

regardless of whether u hear our cries,

we gon' roll our thunder

take this info

twist it in ur locs, afros and sundress

steada shoutin 

ONE LOVE

we really needa be shoutin 

ONE LESS

cuz we lead each other astray

when we can't move past these dumb threats

boxing our ppl together as ONE--

well i'm suffocating faking "straight" in this one chest

HOW THE HELL CAN WE MOVE FORWARD TO FREEDOM

WHEN YOU CANT EVEN RESPECT THIS ONE YET?

MY PEOPLE...HOLD ON.

MY PEOPLE...HOLD ON.

SHOUT OUT TO THE SLAVE MASTERS! Says Uni Q. Mical , Monday, November 3, 2008 at 1:41 PM, in Labels: africa, lost, slave master, slavery, soulja boy

See I can't even be mad at this lil' boy anymore.

People tend to blame Soujla Boy for the death of hip-hop, the coon-itis that has taken the radio by storm. But when I hear shit coming from his mouth like "shout out to the slave masters. Without them, we'd still be in Africa. We wouldn't be here to get this ice and tattoos," I recognize this is an epidemic that's larger than Soulja Boy. 

Obviously for centuries our history has been systematically erased from our minds. ANY replica of Africa in our veins has been coughed out, white washed, bleached, and assimilated into this terrorist American land we now call home. Little boys and girls in the hood don't call each other kings and queens, not Nefertiti and King Tut, naw, but AFRICAN BOOTYSCRATCHER, MIDNIGHT, CRISPY, BUTTNEKKID...none of which are positive representations. Why? Because all we're bombarded with is Christian Children's Fund, flies hanging on the face, emaciated, AIDS wreaking havoc...our public school education does not give us the foundation of our homeland, but of THIS homeland, and omits the massacre that it took to even create this land. INCLUDING SLAVERY. The 3/5's. The not being considered human, maybe? Ah, white American romanticism.

And even slavery is a joke now, to black youth. I think imma start screening The Birth of a Nation and Bamboozled in Pre-K to make our history a reality, because mental slavery, such as what comes out of Soulja Boy's mouth, shows the bondage we REALLY are still in. Not to mention the noose around his neck of a record label that wants him to keep pumpin out the coon ass shit...talk about a shout out to massa. 

IF WE KNEW OUR HISTORY, WE'D KNOW WE ARE OPPRESSED.

The precise way to make us submit was to demean where we're from. And force us to demean it too. Score 1 for Whitey...again.

Truth be told, nobody in the hood wants to go back to Africa. Ask anybody, they'll tell you, "Hell NAW I aint African! I was born in (insert city here)." But honestly, how can we ever love ourselves...if we hate our origins. And yes, we were born on American soil, but our history begins BEFORE slavery existed. But of course, the way to maintain power is to force us to forget.

WE GOTTA GET BACK, Y'ALL, CUZ WE'RE LOOKING LIKE SOME GOT DAMN FOOLS. 

Study Links Teen Pregnancy To Sexy TV Shows Says Uni Q. Mical , at 1:09 PM, in Labels: black, juno, pregnancy, teen, tila tequila, tv, white people, youth of color

...Now who's dumb enough to ACTUALLY believe this shit???

Ever since the Juno blowup, Bristol an' dem, white folk just gotsta wrap their heads around why teen pregnancy rates in the US are still sky high...Reuters' author Andrew Stern got the answer:

"Exposure to some forms of entertainment is a corrupting influence on children, leading teens who watch sexy programs into early pregnancies and children who play violent video games to adopt aggressive behavior, researchers said on Monday.

In findings that covered 718 teenagers, there were 91 pregnancies. The top 10th of adolescents who watched the most sexy programing were at double the risk of becoming pregnant or causing a pregnancy compared to the 10th who watched the fewest such programs, according to the study published in the journal Pediatrics.

"Television is just one part of a teenager's media diet that helps to influence their behavior. We should also look at the roles that magazines, the Internet and music play in teens' reproductive health," Chandra said, acknowledging still other factors can influence teen sex habits.

Living in a two-parent family reduced the chances of a teen getting pregnant or causing a pregnancy. Black teenagers, and those with discipline problems, had higher risks."

REALLY????

Okay, y'all made me have 2 get academically angry black woman on this one:

It must be noted that this article is, by no means, a comprehensive explanation of the multitude of reasons behind teen pregnancy, mostly including environment, race, class, household, etc. Even these reasons must be analyzed, as blindly stating that "black teenagers and teenagers with disciplinary problems are at higher risk", as the author Andrew Stern mentions, is highly problematic. This does not explore the dire dynamics of systematic racism, poverty, and neglect that youth of color experience in these environments.

Moreover, the patriarchial gendered dynamics in these communities often force young women to believe, consciously or unconsciously, that men have the power. The lack of comprehensive sexual education in many public schools in youth of color communities, as well as sexual taboos and silence surrounding sexual activity, also contribute to the curiosity and experimentation.

So, whereas white teenagers can seemingly be harmfully influenced by television and movies to guide their sexual behavior, youth of color are scapegoated as hypersexual since birth, and this behavior is expected of them, and not seen as threatening or surprising. Nevertheless, a thorough discussion of this topic, beyond the sensationalism of television, must be had in order to understand why teenage pregnancy continues to persist in the US.

Once again, our bodies on the line, the actions that are expected of us.

So while little Sally Walker in Missouri can watch Tila Tequila and trip, fall and land on Johnny's dick, the rest of us have been rubbin on our tiddies since birth. Right?

EATING THE OTHER. Says Uni Q. Mical , Wednesday, October 29, 2008 at 12:17 PM, in Labels: beauty, black, consumption, dark meat, eating, other, woman

i went to NY this past weekend to perform at Columbia w/ my homegirl for the Latino Heritage Showcase. The topic? Color complexes. While there, it seemed EVERY public interaction gave us the reassurance that our poem was NOT in vain. i had the rude re-awakening that it's sooo hard trying to talk to white boys abt their privilege when i'm filled with so much RAGE from listening to their generalizations (those african-americans and spanish people with their 8 kids and child support)...AND dealing with being daily exotified and consumed and fetishized (hey, i LOVE dark meat!)...

WHAT'S A BLACK WOMYN TO DO????

respond with the poison. the word. 

so, here it is. one of many....eating the other. for all my survivors, my strong ones, my quiet ones, my loud ones. just living is a blessing...and a burden.

*this isnt the poem we performed, just a spark of inspiration sittin in class. more on the other piece later. 

and i’m

f  u  r  t  h  e  s  t

from your white conceptions of beauty.

 

lips been puffy since birth

to bite fruits is a blessing

the juices

keep them softened and blooming

like some tulips on Juneteenth

but don’t see me as all sweet,

cuz my expressions will school thee

jumpin off the tongue

same force as an army gun

warrior in the flesh

the casualties are historical rumps

shaking and baking

swaying hypnotic

rulers and rapings

repulsive and desired, such a brutal embracing

 

BUT I AM NOT YOUR PLAYTHING.

 

beautiful and on toppa my

natural clouds on my head got me on a knotty high

and don’t need you to validate it

not the fruit in your exotic pie

can't eat me 2 release me

cuz while the master’s sleeping

my sharpened knives are screeching

machete’d my way 2 freedom

YOUR WORST FEAR—

a chocolate womyn and her poison thoughts

independent of the gimmicks

from a system that wants me

auctioned off

unless i’m working within it

making you money while my top is off

the camera rolls

at how she flows

but that black bitch betta not ever talk

but even with that

my words scream louder than sapphire

fuckin ya flawed ideals like jezebel

telling mammy to retire

on a daily got me wired

like the streets of my city rollin

B-more in my blood, Afrika in my aorta

sick of adherin to what you told me

cuz you’re the reason i felt lonely

dark skinned & depressed

fit tighter than skin & bones

but i’ve grown 2 believe

that your history does not own me.

i’m uplifting so this brown

can drift like continents around the globe

WE

send the new memo of who we are

eres bella mama,

the stars

shine brighter on our skin

shout it until your throat is parched

give a big FUCK YOU to whoever denies our power

our past has shaped these bodies

but we must define us today for our tomorrow.